The Right to Rest

Unpacking the historical, cultural, and economic obstacles that prevent Black women from achieving the rest we deserve

Rest: No purchase required? image credit: Shutterstock

“When in danger, run to a Black woman.” A white woman on TikTok taught this, now viral, phrase to her children. Through her teachings she reinforces the harmful narrative of the “Strong Black Woman,” which posits Black women are inherently resilient, self-sacrificing and capable of enduring hardship without complaint. It completely ignores Black women’s vulnerability and places the burden of safety and problem solving on Black women, absolving others of their responsibilities. Why is this so? When did Black women sign up to be “strong?” The truth is, we didn’t. Black women deserve rest, but due to enforced narratives, financial and structural barriers, rest can be hard to realize. Unpacking the historical, cultural and capitalist barriers to Black women's rest, understand why rest is important.

Like Many Things, it Started with Slavery   

This country was built on Black women being exhausted, one could argue. Black enslaved women used to not only work the fields they also had to come home and continue working. According to the Lowcountry Digital History Initiative, “After completing their tasks, enslaved family members and wider communities expected women to perform gendered domestic labor. These chores included caring for their own infants and children, keeping their homes clean, cooking, and washing clothes. There was virtually no time for enslaved women to rest, and most women worked for enslavers five or six days a week (Sunday was a day of rest). Domestic chores and childcare took up the remainder of their time.” On their off days, enslaved women had to attend their gardens to eat, make clothes to wear for church. This country planted the seed that Black women are ”strong" and don't require or deserve rest. As time progressed this seed has grown into this false ideology that supports the narrative that rest for Black women is a privilege rather than a priority. When the truth is, rest is a necessity, not something to be earned but a right.

Rest, They Tell Us, Costs Money Black Women Don’t Always Have  

The wealth gap in America makes it harder for women to rest in the way society defines it. According to Brookings “for every $100 in wealth held by white households, Black households held only $15.” Due to this large wealth gap both parents in Black households are more likely to work. Black women are most likely responsible for the children and daily affairs. This is even harder for the “44.6 percent of Black households with only one parent.” With limited time and resources, resting in the way rest is marketed isn't ideal for most Black women.  

Rest comes with a cost, according to television and ads. Ads ask us to buy this new candle for peace and relaxation or book this vacation or spa trip. It discourages a lot of Black women who are already working hard and struggle to afford luxuries. The media establishes a mindset if you can’t afford luxuries, you aren’t working hard enough, and you should keep working until you can. Rest is not a luxury. Rest can be what you make it and what fits your income. Rest doesn’t have to come with a price and can be as simple as taking a moment to sit down. 

Despite it all, rest is important and Black women deserve rest. Even though societal norms, financial barriers and false narratives don't support Black women resting, there are plenty ways to incorporate rest into your busy lifestyle. We do not have to be superheroes anymore, sometimes starting off with the bare minimum and adding to it can be just as impactful to give ourselves more time to relax. It's ok to make things easier for yourself and know what works for you even if it doesn't fit into societal norms. Know you are enough and it’s fine to prioritize your needs. 

Also read: Free or cheap ways Black women are resting

Tell us: What does rest look like to you? What are the best free or low-cost ways to rest? image credit: Shutterstock