The place where you spent your formative years shapes who you are. You always carry it with you. Southerners who leave find reminders: Though they took themselves out of the South, Southernness has not departed from their DNA.

Once, a rival queen from the other tribe became aggressive, as they both danced through the street. Her taunts took a more biting tone. The young women quickly moved away from playful sparring. The teasing escalated. It started with cursing each other out and devolved into shoving, headed toward a full-on brawl.

In New Orleans, a young woman in trouble might skip over the first lady of the church or even bypass her own mother to seek help from this revered community figure.